Home » #ROW80 » A Special Check In

A Special Check In

Today marks the last day of my 34th year.

Tomorrow, July 9th, is my 35th birthday! I plan to do so many things differently starting tomorrow. Of course, personal change does not  literally happen over night but I gave myself until my birthday to get my mind right in order to begin putting action to my goals.

I become reflective and very sentimental around my birthday. Sometimes, sickeningly so. But this year, I give myself a pass. My friend, Paul, and I share a birthday. Paul died last year. August 9th. This year, I reflect on my life from the perspective of a person who has lost a friend.

I have regrets.

We think we have time. We place emphasis on trivial things. And then, suddenly, time is up. We have regrets.

Well, I do. Unfortunately.

I try to find the lesson in all of my experiences, especially the particularly difficult situations, to help me to heal and to grow.  From Paul’s passing I learned that I need to live while I still have time. Not just merely exist. Not live in fear but truly live. Enjoy life and be the best me that I can be. It does not happen over night. It takes some time to break out of old habits.

So, I am living.

I wrote a birthday wish list of simple pleasures. Nine of them.

9. A handmade card- My dad used to make me cards because, he said, the time and love put into it gave it more meaning

8. A flower- I love Calla Lillies! They are so beautiful!

7. A home baked cake- yellow cake with chocolate icing… Mmmmmm

6. A song- I love music. Having music just for me would be awesome! Even if its just a few lines, my smile would be SO big!

5. A book- I love to read and I love to write so a novel or a journal would be awesome!

4. A toast- add me in the dinner toast with your family or come visit and we’ll toast to another year

3. A photo- I’ve known a lot of people for many years. I’m sure there are pictures out there of memorable times. Send me a copy or let’s take pictures together now.

2. A hug- Hugs are great. And they don’t cost a bit. They help squeeze the “blue” out or intensify the glee if that’s my mood.

1. A prayer for Paul.

 

Finally, here’s my update:

While I have not written every day, I am still averaging 250 words per day. I’m still working hard to write everyday though.

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2 thoughts on “A Special Check In

  1. Aww, happy birthday! It’s always a shame that it’s not until someone passes that we’re reminded to live our lives better, but it’s one of the many gifts they leave for us when they go. I hope tomorrow is a wonderful day for you.

    Like

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